Baby

LUCAS ANTHONY MILES

<33

My newphew was born this morning. it only took 18hrs!!! omg i am never having children. im thinking suraget. :)

I am so tired that i can't sleep and am now starting to get a massive headache. how sad is that.

Work was ok. i think i finished everything. if not who cares. i don't work tomorrow! Lucas (nephew) comes home tomorrow. which will be cool. and i am supposed to have a "girls night" with heather. she is the one friend down here that i actually love to chill with. how sad is that. But i love her for letting me be who i am. she doesn't mind that i am blunt and tell the truth. she has a weird boyfriend but i can deal. he is rly nice.

I hate ppl that try to change other ppl. let them be who they wanna be!

$$$$

NO MORE SPENDING MONEY!!

i can't spend anymore money. specially on stupid crap! like food...and shoes..and makeup..and clothes..no more sailorjerry..
at least not until i buy my plane ticket and after i go to reno so i have money for bar hopping.lol.
i say NO MORE!!

Jason is gonna help me with my addiction and whenever i text him and tell him im gonna go shopping he's has to yell at me. and say no! lol i think it will work. hopefully.

crazy dreams

Being sick sucks! i just wanna be better alrdy. i guess it didn't help that i went swimming yesterday. o well. it was awesome. it was a first time in a long time that my mom and i actually had fun together.just her and i. i let her make fun of me and i didnt bitch her out for it. i was so proud of myself.

So i've discovered that when u are on meds u can have some crazy ass dreams. not last night but the night befor i had one about jason and torri and when i woke up i wanted to smack jason right across the face. but last night i had another one about them and when i woke up i felt like i needed to save them from something, it was weird. i mean i have had weird dreams befor but nothing that has made me wanna take action when i wake up. i need to get better and fast.

I bought some new sailor jerry stuff yesterday. 2new sashes and a new purse! all together lets just say it was "enough"lol

i have a shopping addiction!!!

....

HELP!

my family

my biological father is a whore and has other kids. well i just got in touch with my lil sister. she is my half sister of course. she is 13. the weird thing is if u see a picture of me at that age we look like twins. we decided that we(ben,matt,christina,sam) are going to fly her out to florida so we can see her. we have only seen her twice in our lives. and it was way back in like 2003(for my sister christina's graduation) apparently i have another sister too. but she is older than matt. and we have no idea were she is. people say she is in like colorado or something. maybe one day i will meet her but its doubtful. O yeah my sisters name is tempest. and my spermdonor is now in prison again for the 4th time. and her mom is a druggie. she deserves a better life than this. she is only 13.

Andy came home yesterday. and he leaves again in 2weeks. my mom is always so happy when he's home. i wish he could stay longer. i never knew how much he influenced me.

yesterday i lost one of my contacts. but i found it! so everything is all good. i have another eye doctor app. on may 5th. my mom and dad don't like me with contacts. but o well. they are gonna have to get used to it. my face is free from glasses and i love!

THE PLAN (for my 21st)

I am going to be in florida for my actual birthday but on that weekend i am going to try and fly to reno. (so torri if u could go there that weekend that would be awesome) i just started planning this a couple days ago. i wanna spend my 21st with my two favorite ppl in the world. i hate that im the youngest out of the group but hey in 2 more months i will finally be able to go to bars! :)